I can't get it right since I met you.

Somedays are worse than others, someday I just can not handle myself anymore. You are everything that I had ever wanted in a man, because I wanted a bad man, like any girl would.
It is obviously bitting me.
Im a good girl. Not a good woman because I am too whiny to be one and not a good person because I am just not but, I do everything you want me to do and I would do more if you ask me to, this is just wrong, right?
There is not a single man who is still seeking for a good girl. Men want strenght and confidence, because that is what a real woman has. Girls, in the other hand, are fragile and romantic. Passive and weak. I rock at being a girl.
But, seriously, what is wrong with me? Why can't I be mad at you just for once? Why can't I do something? Why am I not clear? Why do I have to cry everytime I have to tell you something "important"?
Because of you.
You made me like this. I had a very weird feeling when I met you, I knew you would be my ruin.
I love you, but this love had made me crazy. I know that I have no life without you, I know that I depend/ relay on you for pretty much everything but I made a mistake: I let you know about it. All the time.
You know that you are my whole life and that is the best reason as any for a man to hurt a woman... in this case, a little girl. Or a little dog, I'm not quiet sure.
I can't stand up for myself, for what i think, for what I belive or for who I am, I can't anymore because I LOVE YOU and I dont want to hurt you, EVER.
But this is still going on bigger and stronger everday.
It makes me sad because it is not just about hurting you but also about upseting you. And I know pretty much everything can make you upset, that's way I rather shut up and do whatever you want to do.
I rather please YOU, make YOU happy and loving YOU than me. It is that simple.
And it sucks, I know. I know that it isn't just because I love you, it is because I am afraid.
I am afraid to be alone and I am afraid of being without you (there's a difference), but, most of all, I am afraid of what you can do to me if you get mad at me. I have seen that look in your eyes when you are angry, I have seen the power and the fury running through your eyes and it terrifies me. It doesn't scares me to be beaten or dumped, your words are the deal. You can kill me just by telling me that I am not worth it. Because it is true.
That's the key.
But, you know, I rather being without you than making you unhappy so probably I would take it if necesary. That's it. Do what you want to me as long as you are ok.
You will get tired of me one way or another. Soon or later. You will end up bored because of how good I am, how stupid, useful/less I had been. But, you know what? Screw that and screw you.
I love you.